Thats been my word for the past couple days. The causes are manly stupid, but I've been very frustrated with the feeling that I can't vindicate myself. It's not that I don't have the right arguments. I can vindicate myself, especially in my mind, for hours.
The problem is, and this is a big one. I'm nice. It stinks being nice. Its not simply that I'm nice. That's a wimpy excuse not to defend yourself. Its that I think stuff like "I don't know what kind of day they have had" or "What good will my being aggressive back do?"
All that said, this is my moment. Its been building up inside me for the past couple days. Like I said, this is mostly over stupid stuff, people I don't even know online. How lame. But its in me and I need it out.
I'm sorry you were having a bad day.
I'm sorry that I did something you considered to be incorrect.
I'm sorry that I respected you.
I'm sorry that I tried to explain myself at all to you.
I'm sorry you felt the need to project inordinate amounts of anger toward me.
I'm sorry you think it works to put a smilie face at the end to make it seem nice.
I'm sorry you didn't think about how the one
obscure
meaningless,
faceless person you took all the bad day out on was
me,
the one person who would
care,
go red in the face,
and cry.
Do I need to be less sensitive. Ohyeah. Was I having an emotional day too? Definitely. Am I sorry I am not sorry? No.
Whew.
Thank you.
All this said... think. Think before you take any anger out on someone. Think before you are rude. Think before you assume you know their motives. Think of how you want to be treated. Think of how crappy their day may have been. Think of the better.
Even if they are just a name on a screen.
Also, to the person this was toward... I sincerely hope today was better.
You are so much more mature than that person! Your beautiful heart woukd never dream od being unkind like you were treated. I'm so proud of the person you are! xoxo, Mom
ReplyDeleteLet's be clear about this: there's no weakness in kindness.
ReplyDeleteRepeat: there is no weakness in kindness.
Now, let me continue from there.
What good would being aggressive back do? None whatsoever, however if you care about someone -- if you *love* someone -- then you speak the truth to them.
That doesn't mean being aggressive or mean. You simply speak the truth in love. There is nothing unkind about saying, "I don't understand why you are upset with me. I have done nothing wrong and I do not appreciate how you are speaking to me. If you have a reason to be upset, please take the time to help me understand and if you cannot do that without being rude, then please calm down and we can discuss this later."
There's nothing at all unkind about that. Nothing unloving. Nothing even mean or remotely harsh.