Day 61

There is a longing in most, if not all, girls heart to be whole-heartedly, unabashedly, compassionately, tenderly, earth-shatteringly loved.  

 I was thinking about this when Kate Nash's song "Nicest Thing" came on Pandora.   Many of my friends right now are looking for that love.  They are looking for their Mr. Darcy/Edward/Robin Hood/Romeo.    I remember the years of longing for my Warrior Poet.  I wanted so much to have someone hold me at night.  I wanted someone to see only me in the room.   I wanted it to be like there was an invisible string connecting me to him so that no matter what, no matter who we were talking to, or what we were doing, we were always together.  You knew there was a second part of that person somewhere in the room.  Oh, how I remember the painful longing.

 I understand that it's a great example of how we should long for Christ and that He should be enough.  I spent my highschool years with a plan to not date anyone so I could focus on other things, Christ being key.  He was enough for me.  That didn't mean I never wanted a human connection.  If we weren't made to need that, I, a woman, wouldn't be here.  We want to be princesses just as much as guys want to be the knight.  I'm not trying to be sexist or cruel.  I'm not saying either is better or that no one ever strays outside that.   There is no reason why "Twilight" is as popular as it is if this wasn't true.  I've read them.  I like them.  Are they well-written?  Not really.   They portray a character though that will go to all ends to keep his girl safe, someone he can't resist, and yet in the same time, he does resist til wedding day.  (Sorry. Spoiler.)  He is intoxicated by her very presence and yet is willing to give it up to keep her safe.  He will fight for her.  Die (??) for her.  Dazzle her.  (Sorry. Had to.)  Who doesn't want a charming, GENTLEMAN, like that?  

I guess all this is to say, girls, there is nothing wrong with wanting your Someone.  It's God-given even.  Keep God first, fall madly in love with Him and someday, someone will be falling beside you.

Keep hope.  And as Syl and I say, the guy is like a present, you can shake to see what's inside but don't open the box til Christmas.  (I hope you followed that analogue. ;) ) Shake and wait, baby, shake and wait.

"The Nicest Thing"

Kate Nash

All I know is that you're so nice

You're the nicest thing I've seen

I wish that we could give it a go

See if we could be something

I wish I was your favourite girl

I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world

I wish my smile was your favourite kind of smile

I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style

I wish you couldn't figure me out

But you'd always wanna know what I was about

I wish you'd hold my hand

When I was upset

I wish you'd never forget

The look on my face when we first met

I wish you had a favourite beauty spot

That you loved secretly

'Cause it was on a hidden bit

That nobody else could see

Basically, I wish that you loved me

I wish that you needed me

I wish that you knew when I said two sugars,

Actually I meant three

I wish that without me your heart would break

I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake

I wish that without me you couldn't eat

I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep

Look, all I know is that you're the nicest thing I've ever seen

And I wish that we could see if we could be something

Yeah I wish that we could see if we could be something

Day 60

Pee, poo and puke! In one night! Oooooh my glee!  What bounds does my elation know!?  

It's about 6:20AM and I just finished cleaning everything up.  Since Brink is not feeling quite par, we're letting him curl up with "Dad" for a bit.   I'm way tired and should go back to bed, but, I needed a moment.  :p  The p(three) wasn't really as bad as it could have been.  Most was on Brink's towel and the number 2, literally in the case of this list, was as I rushed him out the door, so minimal damage.   Just keeping it real guys.

Can I be honest about something?  Heh.  Unless you have an assassin behind me, I guess, you don't really have a choice whether I am or not.     Here it is.  Drama and I have a love/hate relationship.   I'm the kind of person people will open up to.  I love that.  I love being in the know and knowing that you trust me.   What I hate is being the person in the middle of drama.   I'm pretty sure Proverbs is full of wisdom on this.  I really should look up some verses.   At the place of coffee, there is a lot of drama.  As one co-worker put it, there seems to be an unusual amount of discontentment and complaining.  No one person is to blame.  I love all of my co-workers, I think most have legitimate reasons for their feelings, I just wish we could all get along. I don't understand people.

It's not my boss either.  She's fantastic and not a spreader of any of this.  Heh, made it sound like a disease, "DRAMATITIS."  She's not a carrier.    Funny thing about my boss, in my interview, I used the word epic.  As I was waiting for the call back I was sure that killed me.  Here's how it went:  "Well, my last boss was pretty epic."  Smile.  "I'm not sure how well I'll do, but, I'll try to live up to the epicness of your last boss."   Needless to say, her name in my cell is "Epic."


*Yaaaawwwwwnnnnn*.... back to bed.

Day 59

Mmmmm food.  I love food.  I love making it.  I love eating it.  I love reading about it.  I love watching movies about it.

And I love taking pictures of food.

Smile in the bottom of my homemade yogurt.
:)

Homemade French loaf
(It needed more salt but still good.)

In other news, Brink and Topher are getting absolutely huge.  Brink is almost too big to pick up. 

What have we gotten ourselves into??

Day 58

Here's a question for all my fellow bloggers:  Do you use an editor before you post on here or do you just type it up in Blogger?   In two weeks, time is going to majorly open up for me to blog more.   I covet prayers because I'm so not a naturally self-disciplined person.  I need to grow by leaps and bounds and I know that is done... a step at a time?

There is so much life out there.  I need to grab it and not let go.  I will ride this wild creature til the end.

Day 57

It would seem I accidentally named two "Day 54s".    I'm so sorry about that and any confusion it may have caused.   I've been trying to get caught back up, thus, all the days that there are two or three days in.  




Also, I have to explain the icon thing.  Okay, so, I don't have to, but, I feel compelled to.    I love icons.   I love the cuteness of simple squares containing art and sayings.  I love the moving ones.  I love the plain ones with just one thing on them.  I love the ones with sayings on them... and I love giving credit.   Unfortunately, when I went through a major infatuation with icons a few years ago, I didn't keep track of where I got them.  This was in the days of Xanga and the early days of My______.  I had literally over a thousand saved on my computer and, from there, on my Photobucket.   I've been going through the PB collection so I can actually use them on here.   If I have used your icon and didn't know it, I'm so sorry.  I'll do better.

Here's some of the favs:

Day 55

I've been making some changes.  It's starting to show.  My face is clearing, my clothes are hanging a little looser.   [[Totally funny side moment.  I just found out two things: Brink can now jump up to the big couch.  Two, sometimes, when your sister is chasing you, mom is who you run to.  Back to our regularly scheduled show.]]  I feel better knowing I'm making changes for my betterment. I also love having co-workers ask what I'm doing.  :)  I've been taking smaller portions, and eating more slowly, making sure I enjoy the flavors of what I'm eating.  Also, no watching tv while you eat lunch or dinner.  These two things I've noticed Josh doing too.  I haven't pressured him at all.  He can eat however he likes.   The two are just going hand in hand.

Ooooo, and homemade yogurt.  I made my first batch, fail.  Second batch, success!  In FWDGF, she describes the way fresh yogurt tastes and feels. First time I ate it, I needed honey.  Today, I've just been enjoying it for it.  It's delicious!

Oh, and giving up an iced venti 7 pump chai in place of one doppio, if it's morning and I'm at work, one coffee if I'm not, and water or unsweetened tea for the rest of the day... surprise! Helpful. O_o  Doh.

Basically, just getting back to the basics.  Water and enjoying simple food.

Pinterest

EDIT: I forgot to mention:  I eat bread. 

And a square of dark chocolate every day. :D

Day 54

In my very small defense, I tried to post yesterday.

I'm a person of drastic change.  It doesn't happen often, but when it does, I like to keep it low key and slowly shock the world.   I love doing things like growing my hair out and then, suddenly, chopping it up to my chin.   Moving over a period of 3 months.  Being single and then, suddenly, I'm engaged.  (Okay, so I've only done that once. (: )  





It just seems to be the way God and I roll.  It's months of one thing, then all the
sudden, BAM! God leads me somewhere else, and fast.    Normally it starts as this little nagging desire, and then it turns into a full blown longing and this feeling of knowing it's the way.   Odd, but true.  I'm sure there are some people who would complain about this method of viewing God and leadership, but it's worked for me.
I don't recommend it for everyone.  I follow God's peace.  For some, that might not be how it works.



All that said, I quit.   Today is actually the perfect day to announce this because it is the beginning of the actual "two weeks."   My boss has been a huge blessing, giving me a window of time to come back before she fills my position.





I'm kinda scared but not.  It's like, I dunno, playing hide and seek in the dark.  It's a little scary because you can't really see and people can surprise you, but it's so exciting to see how the game plays out.




I don't have for sure plans yet.   I am just taking the first step.

I wanna stay home a little while, get into a groove.  It's time to make this house home.
I'd love to work on art more diligently.  Maybe even start an artist day where I set up, put on music and people are welcome to come by and create as they wish.
It's the perfect time for the pups too as they are needing more intense attention.   I say that as they wrestle on the floor.
I also want to spend time reconnecting with others.
Oh yeah, and blogging.  I'm loving doing this blog and have some ideas for a few more.

I may spend a week at home, go stir crazy, and go back.  I kinda doubt it though.