Saturday, April 9, 2011

Day 69 | How We Met

 This was posted on a blog I did leading up to our wedding.  Enjoy:)

In early April, my mom’s friend, T, who used to live in our area added mom to her facebook.
So, Mom spent some time looking around her facebook page catching up with her, then traveled over to her myspace and then to her sons’ myspaces. As she read T’s son, J *also known as Somewhere* myspace her jaw totally dropped and kept dropping lower and lower. “He has so much in common with Didge!”, she kept thinking. Lots and lots of things…from the normal to the bizarre, such as both drawing the same design on our arms in the same places, both being born in British Commonwealth countries (Me-Australia, J-England) in February of 1987, same favorite cars, movies, bands and even J temporarily dyed his goatee the same reddish-purple color that I dyed my hair one summer.
So my mom sent his mom a message: “Do you think J would be interested in a new friendship? Have him contact Didge if he is.”

That afternoon J contacted me. Thus began a friendship that quickly turned into a very deep friendship and more.

My mom had no idea I had prayed a week earlier, “God, I’m so tired of picking the wrong guys. Half of them have been no good at all. Please let my parents introduce me to the one I’m supposed to be with.”
And, unknown to anyone one on my side of the story, was the fact that T had been praying for J. a week earlier and felt God was telling her to tell J. that he would find “someone for him” at a church where he used to attend, namely mine.
We messaged… a lot for the next few days, like super long, “oh my gosh, you like that too?” two-hour to reply messages. Then J. asked if I had text messaging or IM. I had both. We text constantly (thankfully we both had the same carrier and unlimited texting.) and IM’d well into the night. (We’re both extreme night owls.) J. eventually called me, about a week and a half later, but only after first sending me a video where he took me on a “walking tour” of Savannah, so that that would be the first time we “talked”…”After all,” he said, “our relationship is so unique, that I figure the first time we “talk” should be nothing less than unique.”

He also talked to my dad first on the phone, not to ask permission to call, but on a dare from me since my dad didn’t believe J. had made one of the sound effects on the video.
Our friendship is one of the most eye opening, beautiful, fantastic, fun things ever. But the story doesn’t just end with a friendship…
But I’ll let J. tell part of it next…
How great is God–beyond our understanding! Job 36:26
How great are your works, O LORD. Ps. 92:5

J.’s Tale:
As tales like these go, this one begins with a “Once upon a time.” And in this “once upon a time,” there was a boy, and there was a girl. They knew each other long ago when they were but children. Now, all grown up, they meet again….
The first few days they just got to know one another again. They asked of likes and dislikes and things in between.
The next few days they talked on the phone. They talked for hours on end about everything and nothing, all at the same time. Until four in the morning they talked and talked. They liked each other a lot. And each could tell what the other one thought.
You could almost say it was love at first sight. But it really was not, because they had not yet met (at least they could not remember meeting as children).
Astonishing? Yes!
Amazing? This is true.
For the boy had not seen the girl, and the girl had not seen him too. But they loved each other, that girl and this boy. And nothing, not money nor fame, could bring them such joy.
Well now they are getting married. It’s what happens next in stories like these. You see, he asked her, and she agreed. Again, these things happen in tales such as these. Very soon they will be married, these two will be a “we.”
This is how it happened, believe me or not. But it happened this way, just as sure as you sit in that spot.
Although this story must end, the real one does not. This fairy tale goes on, you see, even though you might not believe. But God brought them together, and that’s good enough for me.
-The End-

And the fairy tale continues…..
Okay, more bragging on my wonderful J.
While I was at a conference, Wednesday, April 30th, my parents received a beautiful letter from J., handwritten in fountain pen on embossed gold stationery. He’d told me he was writing it that Monday and sworn me to secrecy days before that. I’ll admit, I cried when he had told me what he was going to do. But I asked him not to tell me everything it would say. So, anywho, that Monday he had spent a good number of hours practicing writing the letter. Keep in mind, using a fountain pen is not easy for a lefty. Mom calls me Wednesday, while I’m at the conference and tells me that her and Dad had a very encouraging time of prayer concerning J. and I. All I could do not to tell her that a letter was coming that very day.

So here’s the letter they received:
“I, J.D.E, formally request your daughter’s hand in marriage.
Didge is your first child and only daughter. I know she is very dear to your heart and the apple of your eye.
You have guarded her from the time she was born. You have protected her in a different way than your two sons.
I would be honored if you allow me to share in this role of guarding and protecting your daughter.
I love Didge with all my heart. I know this is a God thing because I love her and I haven’t even seen her. I have fallen in love with the inside. Your daughter has a beautiful heart.
Scared to death,
Excited for what’s to come,
and holding on tight while on this ride.

My dad gave his blessing to J. and I (provided J. didn’t do anything “knuckleheaded” LOL) in Savannah on May 11th.
This was another HUGE confirmation to me. My dad has been very discerning over the years about guys in my life. He had always known, very quickly into me developing an interest in a guy, that he was not right. So for him to not say a single negative thing about J. and to know, so soon, that he would give his blessing, really had to be of God. I’m my dad’s little girl. Giving me away in marriage is definitely not a matter he takes lightly.
My story really won’t be complete without this detail, because for me and J. it is the most important. Both J. and I made lists in the past year and a half of what we wanted in a future spouses. I’d always had a “idea” in my mind of what he would be like, but didn’t take the time to write it all down until Feb. ’08. I was dealing with a lot of confusion in the area of boyfriends and had been counseled by many to get it on paper what my standards were. I decided then and there to hold out for that guy. I’d never dated before, and I wanted that man. So I told the guy that I was talking to at the time, that I was sorry, but God was telling me “no.”

A week later I met J.

Another confirmation, every guy beforehand, God had laid on my heart at some point in “interest” that I could do better. Not cause they were all bad, cause they weren’t. Some even met ALMOST all the standards, but not EVERYTHING. But they were not who He had for me. J. was the first, and only guy, that God impressed on my heart “He’s the better”
On J.’s side, he had recently questioned the same things. “Maybe I should take a few things off my list and not have such a high expectation,” he told his friend a week earlier. Thankfully, his best friend counseled him, “keep your standards high and wait”
Well, here’s the cool part. We both match each others list.

And these are no ordinary lists.
For one thing, we both have exactly 31 points on our lists. Strange? Yes.
And these were not ordinary lists, but like I’ve wanted a “warrior poet”. My mom responded “What is that anyway??” when I told her. I had read about it in a book once, and knew my heart needed one. J. is definitely a Warrior Poet (he is a “modern day knight”–- google it – and he writes poetry/songs).

So that’s the part of the story I’m going to include in this note. I’m going to type about the engagement with J. later. Love to you all!

“We’re in perfect rhythm. You’re the Bass Clef to my Treble. Together,
we’re a beautiful melody of praise to God. Apart, we’re just a tinkering sound.”

~ Me"

Day 68 | "Somewhere"

Fellow blogger, Ladaisi, asked me a question on why I call my husband "Somewhere."  Lemme tell you the story....

Somewhere and I had a very strange, fantastic, magical, natural, quirky courtship.  By the time I met him face to face, we knew we wanted to get married, so much so that he had already written my father.  Somewhere worked so hard to make sure that everything was unique about how he did just about everything. :-p  If you want more of a summary of our whole story, you can read that in my next post.  Anywho, the first time I met Somewhere in Savannah, we spend the weekend together.  To clarify, my dad and youngest brother went with me.  I didn't stay in Somewhere's dorm.  It was an incredible weekend of walking the riverside, seeing SCAD, and just being with Somewhere.  He washed my feet that weekend, gave me a tiny kiss on the cheek when he thought I fell asleep on his shoulder while we sat on a bench at night on the above mentioned riverside, gave me the longest hug at the first meeting, whispering in my ear that I was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.  It was dreamy. :)  Shortly before it was time for me to leave, we were sitting at one of the many fountains, Somewhere was running his hand on my face, memorizing me. :-p  I asked him, as a joke, who he was.  He replied, "Somewhere," misunderstanding my question.  I told him that was officially my nickname for him and I would call him that when we were sitting on our porch at 80.   He's my Somewhere.

I love him. :)

Day 67 | "Urban Decay"

I don't know how many of you know this, but I'm literally obsessed with make up.  I've never allowed myself to get sucked into the world of glamour magazines and such, but I adore make up.  If I could make money just teaching people make up... holy cow.  I would so love that.  I know there are more important things in life than make up.  There are so many things so much more eternal.  I also know that having a sparkly eyeshadow, or hair you feel beautiful about, or that t-shirt that fits just right can have a totally altering effect on your day.

Yes, listening to worship or read your Bible first.  That's gonna give you the best glow.  Do not feel badly though spending a little time to look lovely.  It will totally change your outlook. *Says I, the makeupless, baggy jeans and tshirt, damp haired mess I am. :P*

I was browsing Urban Decay just a minute ago... bad idea.  I was looking for the things that would be the best for an idea I have on make up tutorials.  The new Book of Shadows III made me drool. The colors are fan-freaking-tastic!  Of course, seeing as I'm out, I need to get a new Big Fatty Mascara soon... oh time and money... you fiends.

If I were to do videos of the little tips I've picked up in life, would any of you watch it?

Friday, April 8, 2011

Day 66

Today is my last day at work.  My boss called a little while ago to tell me she was leaving dinner for me and I was welcome to use her as a reference.  I'm going to miss her a lot.  I'm going to miss most of life at S.  One thing I won't miss... the 1 and a half hour round trip drive to work.

This is it.  It's real.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Day 65

There's very little Somewhere has said "no, you can't do that anymore" in our marriage.  He is very willing to allow me to express myself and look however I want.  I am not allowed to speak just how ever I want though.  It's not a matter of grammar.  Its a matter of word choice.  Here are the no-fly zones in speech for me:


This is not cruelty.  I am not a suppressed wife.  I am not mentally abused.   I am a wife, a woman, a daughter, a sister, a person, wrapped in fear.  I am afraid of so many illogical/realistic/complex things.  I live a life of fear.  I  have a wonderful husband who has discernment and compassion for me.  It is because of that, that Somewhere picked up on some words that I unknowingly used all the time.  He calls me out on them.  "Why are you scared?"  "Why do you worry?"  "Why are you afraid?"

"Sorry" and "trying" were words I threw around haphazardly.  I was constantly sorry for who I was and whatever I did.  I also used it so much as a "get out of jail free" card that the word had no meaning.  That   quickly came to an end even before we were married.
"Trying" was a word I used to make myself think I was doing something about a situation, but really, the only thing I was doing was saying I was trying.  That was the extent of my try.  In the words of Yoda, "Do or do not. There is no try."   Now I either am or am not.  There is no try.

 The time of freedom is here.  I serve an amazing, powerful, all-knowing, intense Savior, who without His word, nothing happens to me. Why on earth should I be afraid unless I do not trust Him, and, in not trusting, show that I do not know Him.

"Joshua 1:9
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."

Fret not.  

Day 64

There's no more excuses.  I've been looking on this morning and I'm filled with longing.  I'm filled with a scary, exciting... desire.  I'm "scared" because I know God has a way of totally changing on you look at things and what your goals should be in the life you have here on earth.  I'm wondering "what is He going to say... what will be required of me?"  I know part of the answer is "everything."

It's like a friend and I were talking about the other night, they were talking about how they asked God to take it all, thinking in their mind what that would mean.  They figured He would want this, this and this.  We decided then that at the time, he wasn't saying "take it all," he was saying "I'm willing to give you what I think You want."  That's okay.  There's points where God is patient with us when we say "I'm just not ready to let go of that."   There also has to, simply has to, be a time though when you submit, entirely to whatever God's will is, without seconding guessing what that is.  God tells us to sum up if we have what it takes.  I think in the end though, the sum has to be "I don't have it.  You have the ability, though, to make me readied for whatever you have in store, even if, that means death."

As of tomorrow, I will be staying home.  I have no excuse of busyness to place up as a "shield" to avoid God.  My coming home was to follow what I have from Him, I do have the feeling though that He is about to say "Okay, let's have coffee and talk..."

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Day 63

Don't go to bed angry.  Not just with your spouse.

If you do, those people will be in your dream, at the dream-backyard-bbq, where you're meeting Santana, who looks like the guy from Underworld in your dream, those people will come along and mess it allllll up.

Just saying.

Don't go to bed angry.


Monday, April 4, 2011

Day 62

Heh, I was laying in bed last night after a crazy long weekend and suddenly thought "Wow.  I have a blog I haven't posted on."     It's been nuts, but a good weekend.  Friday was work, deep talks with a good mutual friend of Somewhere and I and a youth group lock in.  Saturday morning, pups first vet visit, Saturday night, work.   Sunday morning, getting ready for work, took brother to lunch, forgot wallet in Somewhere's car, picked that up, car broke down on way to work, got to work late, got off around 9, went out to eat, came home, 11:45 went to bed.